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Reframing Integrity

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Years ago I attended the funeral of an elderly friend. The person delivering her eulogy stated that my friend had "died with her integrity in tact".

That statement inspired me, and I remember hoping that some day the same might be said of me.

Despite its impact, I have often wondered what was meant by this powerful statement. We have all heard integrity defined as "doing the right thing, even when nobody is watching", but is that what it really means? Does a person with integrity always make the right choice? Does a person with integrity never suffer from an inappropriate decision? If either of these statements is true, does anybody really possess integrity?

Over the course of the past two years I gained new perspective on this topic. During that time, I have sometimes suffered in ways that seemed previously unimaginable. My sufferings came from many different types of poor choices, including some that I should have known better and not made. I now believe that integrity is only shallowly defined by what we do.

True integrity is defined by our ability to admit when we are wrong, and realign our actions with what we value most. It is demonstrated by our willingness to endure the trials we face with patience, even when every fiber of our being screams "this isn't fair!" 

For me, this reminds me willingly repent of my mistakes and forgive others of theirs. To repent, means to change course, and to forgive means to let go. When I am able to live into these two behaviors I find myself becoming the person I was always meant to be.

Integrity also reminds me how critical it is to submit my will, to the will of God, even in the midst of my faith challenging experiences. When I do that I feel whole.

I don't believe integrity is defined solely by our actions. Instead, I think that what is in our heart is a much more important ingredient, for that is what eventually leads us to act.

How do you define integrity?

Please share your thoughts. Especially those that may be different than my own. You can comment here or on my twitter feed.

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548

Follow @andrewthorn


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